laugh out loud funny

Her eyes slid closed, her secret places pulsed in anticipation, and his lips settled onto the skin beneath her ear. That was magic. She held perfectly still. He pressed a kiss to her neck. Then another, lower. A third, even lower. She squirmed. He dropped his hands. “Sorry. I---“ “Don’t stop,” Jimmie whispered.

— Jamie Farrell

Tiny doesn't just sing these words - he belts them. It's like a parade coin gout of his mouth. I have no doubt the words travel over Lake Michigan to most canada and on to the North Pole. The farmers of Saskatchewan are crying. Santa is turning to Mrs. Claus and saying 'what the fuck is that? - will Grayson

— David Levithan

Your mother can’t hear you here.” “Distance is no match for my mother’s eavesdropping and mind-reading skills.” “I had steel anti-mind-reading plates installed this week. Specially designed to be Marilyn-proof. Also sounds an alarm if she gets within two hundred yards of the building, and I sent the guards downstairs to ninja training. You’re safe.

— Jamie Farrell