In unison, they recited an ancient rhyme. "With one blue eye to rule the sky, An eye of brown controls the ground; Magic swirls within our souls, Cryptic, mystic, spiritualistic, To protect the weak from evil's effect, Elements guide us, ever bind us. A band of witches scattered wide From Warlock Morpheus we must hide.

— Vonnie Davis

I think... I shall call ye Beauty, for I shall be yer beast.

— Vonnie Davis

Months ago, he'd told Effie, grandmother to his eldest brother's wife, that he was too busy to find a woman. He went on to brag he was quite happy being alone. That the only way he'd even consider a woman was if she dropped from the gherkin' sky. He groaned and downed his first cup of coffee. He and his big whiskey loosened tongue.

— Vonnie Davis

Och, my potion is boiling. I need to say good night and keep an eye on the pot. Ye Anna overboil newt's eyeballs.

— Vonnie Davis

Quick! What aisle are the douches in? I've got three bitches at the beach cottage, and they all stick to high heaven."... "You do carry Massengill, don't you? That's the best brand, according to my research." "Ah..." What kind of man researches douches? A man who goes to bed with three women... "Would you mind checking your inventory in the back? I'll need more." "I'm not allowed to leave the register, but I'll be happy to page our stock boy." Douche-man grunted and flipped the package around. "It's going to take at least two boxes for LOA. She's big. Got wide hips. Skinny legs, though. Kinda like a twenty-gallon tank on toothpicks.

— Vonnie Davis

She leaned her uninjured shoulder against his plump, furry behind and shoved while she bitched to herself, "Four years at the military academy, two years at Kansas State University, survival camp in the swamps of Alabama, more schooling in Florida, and then torture endurance training with the Mossad and all, so I could heave a bear's ass into a helicopter. Freaking real.

— Vonnie Davis

She placed her fingertips on her forehead as if trying to gather her thoughts on how to handle this unexpected scenario. "Do not run from a bear. Make yourself a large target and yell to scare the bear away. Bears are easily frightened unless it's mating season." "Oh, wouldn't it be just my horrible luck to fall on a horny bear?

— Vonnie Davis

She tugged on his hair. "I'll have you know I'm no weakling." He grinned and kissed her forehead. "No, it takes a strong woman to kill a truck.

— Vonnie Davis

Take me inside. Show me if a fireman knows how to start a fire.

— Vonnie Davis

Tell me to stop, Sugar, or I'm going to start a firestorm of emotion neither one of us will know how to handle." She smiled. "I've always loved storms." He jerked her face closer and her heart rate kicked up. "Then it's time you were introduced to a Florida hurricane.

— Vonnie Davis