I love the way music inside a car makes you feel invisible; if you play the stereo at max volume, it's almost like the other people can't see into your vehicle. It tints your windows, somehow.

— Chuck Klosterman

In a roundabout way, Boba Fett created Pearl Jam.

— Chuck Klosterman

In Western culture, virtually everything is understood through the process of storytelling, often to the detriment of reality. When we recount history, we tend to use the life experience of one person — the “journey” of a particular “hero,” in the lingo of the mythologist Joseph Campbell — as a prism for understanding everything else.

— Chuck Klosterman

I once loved a girl who almost loved me, but not as much as she loved John Cu sack.

— Chuck Klosterman

I suppose we'll never know what really happened in that room, though he did tell police, "I did it because I'm a dirty dog." This is not a very convincing alibi. He may as well have said, "I got 99 problems, but a bitch ain't one.

— Chuck Klosterman

It appears that countless women born between the years of 1965 and 1978 are in love with John Cu sack. I cannot fathom how he isn't the number-one box office star in America, because every straight girl I know would see her soul to share a milkshake with that motherfucker.

— Chuck Klosterman

It is impossible to examine questions we refuse to ask.

— Chuck Klosterman

It might sound chauvinistic, but there is a sad reality in rock music: Bands who depend on support from females inevitably crash and burn.

— Chuck Klosterman

It's difficult to cope with the infinite variety of the past, and so we apply filters and settle on a few famous names.

— Chuck Klosterman

It's easier to believe there's a monster under the bed if you've spent the last six months arguing with a monster.

— Chuck Klosterman