The fine line between genius and madness is a punch line. Duck, you idiot!

— Brian Spellman

The first casualty of war is casual wear.

— Brian Spellman

There is a meaning of life, but I've been sworn to secrecy.

— Brian Spellman

There's an ad for every vice. That's advice.

— Brian Spellman

They safely cured the world of sadness, wiser the Pfizer for it?

— Brian Spellman

To Americans, either/or means both.

— Brian Spellman

Ultimate meaning is meaningless. Meaning means everything else.

— Brian Spellman

We contradict all for which we stand for we all stand for the lie the whole lie and nothing but the lie so help save our lying asses.

— Brian Spellman

When all seems hopeless, cross your fingers and stick with the secular prayer.

— Brian Spellman

When to others it's not lying. It's privacy.

— Brian Spellman