If you've got it, flaunt it. And if you don't get it? Flaunt it. 'Cause what are we even doing here if we're not flaunting it?

— Mindy Kaling

I had this kind of unrealistic expectations that were fueled by romantic comedies, and it has both helped me and hurt me in many ways. It helped me because, in general, they've made me hopeful. I just figure things will eventually work out for me. But nobody is like any Tom Hanks character. Nobody is Hugh Grant. No one is Meg Ryan!

— Mindy Kaling

I have a great job writing for 'The Office,' but, really, all television writers do is dream of one day writing movies. I'll put it this way: At the Oscars the most famous person in the room is, like, Angelina Jolie. At the Emmys the huge exciting celebrity is Bethany Frankel. You get what I mean.

— Mindy Kaling

I have such a rich fantasy life, I can't help it. I do make up a lot of romantic stories in my head.

— Mindy Kaling

I lost my mind. I lunged at him and inhaled all of his fries standing up a foot away from the trash can. No food is as delicious as food you eat standing a foot away from a trash can. Ask any possum.

— Mindy Kaling

I'm a role model now. ... I want to be a better person because I don't want to disappoint those girls. I stop and think about my actions more. Furthermore, I tip great, I try not to swear too much, and I remember to thank people and be grateful. And all that stuff I do to "appear' better has actually made me a better person. I wish I had always acted like I was a little bit famous.

— Mindy Kaling

I'm not good at anything except writing jokes. I wasn't good at sports, I wasn't good at anything artsy, ever. Furthermore, I think there was a real worry for a while about what I would be good at. Furthermore, I was just this chubby little Indian kid who looked like a nerd.

— Mindy Kaling

I'm not talking about commitment to romantic relationships. I'm talking about commitment to things: houses, jobs, neighborhoods. Having a job that requires a contract. Paying a mortgage. I think when men hear that women want a commitment, they think it means commitment to a romantic relationship, but that's not it. It's a commitment to not floating around anymore. I want a guy who is entrenched in his own life.

— Mindy Kaling

I'm the kind of person who becomes silent when I get scared, because I hope Death will not notice me if I am very still and very quiet. It has worked well so far.

— Mindy Kaling

In my entire life, I never once heard either of my parents say they were stressed. That was just not a phrase I grew up being allowed to say. That, and the concept of "Me time".

— Mindy Kaling