If your knees aren't green by the end of the day, you ought to seriously re-examine your life.

— Bill Watterson

I go to school, but I never learn what I want to know.

— Bill Watterson

I hate to think that all my current experiences will someday become stories with no point.

— Bill Watterson

I have all these great genes, but they're recessive. That's the problem here.

— Bill Watterson

I liked things better when I didn't understand them.

— Bill Watterson

I like maxims that don't encourage behavior modification.-Calvin

— Bill Watterson

I'm a 21st-century kid trapped in a 19th-century family.

— Bill Watterson

I'm a misunderstood genius."" What's misunderstood?"" Nobody thinks I'm a genius.

— Bill Watterson

I'm killing time while I wait for life to shower me with meaning and happiness.

— Bill Watterson

I'm not a vegetarian! I'm a dissertation!

— Bill Watterson